Coming Home, Coming Full Circle

The subtitle to this blog should be: "Thoughts on Graduating High School, 10 Years Later."

I went home to #Scifivalleycon this past weekend. A large part of me didn't want to go, because even though I loved high school, I hated it (read that carefully) and I was counting this as a sort-of high school reunion. One of the more amusing things I learned while I was there was that my graduating class had a 5 year reunion, and no one invited me.

So, here's how it went. 

I went in hoping that no one would recognize me. New last name, new glasses, general new haircut and style since high school. No such luck - but like all things, God definitely had something greater planned.

One of my oldest friends - seriously, I have known him since elementary school - was the first person to recognize me. I was a bit shocked to see him there, myself - and in full Star Wars cosplay, no less. We ended up having a very nice long chat, and when he had to move on (he was dressed up for all the kids), we seriously hugged like four times before we left. It was really nice to see him, and it was even nicer to admit that I had been depressed in high school, and to hear him admit he'd been high. We laughed at that. If only we had been better friends back then, we might have rounded each other out a lot more. 

Now, I get to have that chance, and I am so happy about that. Meeting him again after all these years, and hearing him admit his own insecurities and uncertainties during high school, made me laugh. Puberty was one demonic joke on us all, I guess. I'm actually going to hang out with him and his girlfriend before I go back down to Atlanta, so it'll be like the good times I barely had in high school.

I did meet some other people there from high school. I enjoyed seeing them again, and hearing how our other mutual friends are doing.

More than anything, going back home gave me peace. It showed me that I wasn't the person now I was back then, even if I did remember all my hesitation and fear really well. I know I am loved now, especially how much I am loved by God. If there is anything I am more certain of coming out of #scifivalleycon, it was that I am loved by God, and that matters more than whether or not other people love me. But it is very, very nice to see that other people love me for who am I - and even for what I was - now. My fear has brought me home, kicking and screaming, only to show me that it wasn't so bad, and it was even really good.

I have come full-circle from high school, and if nothing else, that means you can, too.

 

C. S. JohnsonComment